Well...where to begin...it's now the 10th of October and much has gone by since my last entry in this blog...not sure how many will read it but if nothing else it helps me to organise my thoughts and think through things...If I can be an encouragement to another at the same time then all the better. I suppose it also serves to help keep my Parents and friends back at home updated about what I am learning and doing while out at school.
So...SEM tour; remembering back there are a few key things that I can remember from which I learned and saw my God further revealed through. First off almost the entire team got fairly sick at some point during the tour and at some points we considered the possibility of having to finish tour early. Despite exhaustion at times and sickness we still saw God work in amazing ways. I think we can experience the most fruitful ministries and greatest blessings when we are either forced to or allow God to have ultimate control...our sickness caused us to depend on God and our dependence on God allowed us to be part of His extraordinary plan and work. I wonder at times what it will take for us to surrender our independent and stubborn ways and actually come before God with a true sense of humility and dependence in our ministry. I think our independence really is the root cause of our prayerlessness and resultant lack of influence. Prayerfulness and independence cannot exist at the same time in ones life...Prayer is the very outflowing of our dependence on God...if prayer is not our natural habit than perhaps we ought to consider how much we truly recognise our need for God and our dependence on Him.
After SEM was done I saw once again the incredible provision of God in my life...for the few weeks that I had off before Summer Camp began God saw fit to provide me with rest as I needed it as well as some work to help pay for schooling...What a privilege is mine not to face worry or fear about my finances or basic needs...God has promised to provide!!
Summer Camp...I spent a month at New Life Camp in Durham as part of the leadership team to organise the coming Summer Camps as well as tackle applicable passages of scripture and issues faced while in ministry. It was an amazing month of prayer, struggle, time with friends, and teaching that really stretched me and forced me to consider several issues in my life. Then it was on to 8 weeks of camp...my responsibilities ranged from being a counselor at times to dicipling the other staff to leading games or songs or chapel, and many other activities. Through it all I saw God provide learned more lessons on prayer and dependence and saw again more of God's faithfulness and sufficiency.
Throughout these past months I continue to see more and more of my own inadequacy and sin...how much more self-centred and selfish can I be...I see more and more my improper motives...cravings for worldly things and realise more and more how desensitised I am to sin and how blinded I can become...yet Christ's sacrifice is more than a match for my sin and my failure...can I say that God's mercy and grace still amaze me enough times...This seems to be the continuing theme; that God's mercy and grace are amazing...that He alone is faithful. His mercies are indeed new every morning.
And now I'm back here at School. My Second year at NBBI...already the battle between self and the new man that I have become is raging. It certainly seems fair to conclude that Satan will do his utmost to keep me from learning, to keep me from impacting others for Christ, to keep me from being an encouragement. God has given so many opportunities this year to learn and to impact others yet there are so many things that can distract me and pull me away...If your reading this I would ask that you take some time when you remember me to pray that I would be able to resist temptation and that I would be in constant fellowship and dependence with God...I certainly need your prayers in this area...
And so another chapter begins...what does God have for me in these next days, weeks, and months...I'm not sure...but I can't wait to find out...Simply trusting Him one day at a time.
Andrew Paterson
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